I can’t believe this year

I can’t believe we are in the second week of November. Everyone has commented how quickly this year has gone but for me it seems to have raced by.  I’m here trying to write a post, but I can’t help reflect on what has happened in 2016. I’m not quite sure how this post is going to pan out, nor is there much structure other than how my mind is thinking, so I hope you enjoy seeing my I can’t believe this year.I can't believe this year

This year has been full of the highest highs and the lowest lows; many of which often happen simultaneously. I guess the first significant we had this year to celebrate our three year anniversary and visited The Shard, I blogged about it here, and it was such a magical experience and definitely something I had on my bucket list.

Looking back, it’s crazy to think I finished uni this year and it didn’t feel like I was there for three years even though I hated the first year; I felt lost and alone. Completing my final modules was tough as I knew how hard it was to get a first and I really didn’t want to settle for less so I pushed myself like crazy. I had to visit home a lot as my final major project were a series of images of my sister and she was a superstar to be happy for me to take them and use them. They were intimate and therefore I did not go to, or participate in, my final year exhibition and I was actually pleased I didn’t as the Facebook group documented the drama that was caused by it.

The hardest thing of the year was when Rich got a job back in Devon and had to move back home almost instantly. I remember him packing up his stuff in boxes and I felt so numb. I knew we wasn’t breaking up, but it felt like it. My boss at work was lovely in letting me go back with him and staying in Devon for a while, but it wasn’t the same when you knew you have to say goodbye. This time dragged. I had to get used to Rich working nights and sleeping in the day, he wasn’t there like I was used too and it was so hard. So hard. When I was in London, I felt so alone without him and it took so long to get used too and even to this day I still find it hard him working at nights as we don’t see each other as much as we used too.

The last week in London was particularly difficult and it makes me miss Molli so much as without her, I’d be a mess. We went all out and went out and went to parties like never before to end it on a blast, but also the people I worked with were wonderful in giving me a fantastic send off. I knew leaving people meant things wouldn’t be the same as naturally you never keep in contact as you’d wish. This week I got really nervous about moving back to Devon too as Rich and I hadn’t seen each other in a month and I was scared he’d change his mind when he saw me. Now, I know that was silly to think, but I was so worried.

My graduation was fantastic as I had my family with me, however it felt a little underwhelming. The lecturers spoke about the uni a lot, but I didn’t actually think they helped us succeed all that much, getting a first is all about pushing yourself. Soz.

Moving to Devon was weird at first as we moved into Rich’s parents house which was fantastic as it gave us somewhere to be together and meant we could save for our next place, but our stuff had to stay in storage and it didn’t quite feel like home.

I felt at a loss for ages. I started at a retail store as I transfered from my old sore in London to here, but it wasn’t for me. The people were younger and totally different to me. I kept looking for relevant jobs for my degree but it was so hard and I felt useless and that doing my degree was a waste of time. Thankfully, I got a job and I am now in a position that I really enjoy, I just wished it was more structered shift wise as I still don’t see Rich a lot as my days off always end up different to his.

Our new house is definitely one of the highest points of the year for me. Rich viewed it initially and we arranged a second viewing. I fell in love with it. It had new carpets and windows for when we moved in and so far it has been the perfect space for us both. With two bedrooms, we have space to grow and it highlights why we wanted to move back to Devon; you get so much more room for your money!

I have wanted to start driving since I was 17 but either never had the funds for a car or decided to move to London where I knew I wouldn’t. It was a new years resolution for me to begin this year (as if I actually stuck to it?) and I am learning to drive with my first test booked soon-ish. Hopefully, of course, I won’t need a second. It has been a lot of fun and I know I’ll genuinely feel so free when I have a pink photocard and a car – no more hour and a half buses to work!

My birthday was an incredible celebration as we booked a last minute holiday to Portugal. I think because Rich and I don’t see each other as much as we’d like, this was a well needed retreat. I had a fabulous time (which you can see in this video) and so glad we managed to squeeze in a holiday in what has already been a very hectic year.

Christmas is rapidly approaching and we’re so excited to be celebrating it together for the first time despite the fact we’ve been together for almost four years. Crazy, right? Although I wish we could put the tree up now!

I can’t believe this year, it has been so busy and I’ve felt so excited and happy as well as depressed in so many ways but all in all it has been such a great year to develop and find myself. I have become so much stronger but found my weaknesses too. I can’t begin to imagine next year being half as challenging, but you need years like this to develop and grow.

What have been your high or low points of this year so far? Let me know!

Amy x

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